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The Nightcap! (Straight to Your Head Edition)

Andrew McCutchen and Mark Reynolds both got hit right in the head part of their bodies today.

Coincidence? Actually, yes. But still super painful, one imagines.

Notables

Juan Pierre hit a home run. Yes, an-over-the-fence kind. No, I'm not drunk.

Ricky Romero had one of those "complete-game gems" where you're like, "Yeah, it was a good start, but it wasn't awesome-awesome." Line: 9.0 IP, 2 H, 2 ER. More line: 30 TBF, 4 K, 1 BB, 15 GB on 25 BIP (60.0|PERCENT|). That last part is the best part.

Jose Bautista hit his ML-leading 33rd home run. Man, this is really one of those times when you wished you had that sports almanac thing from Back to the Future II.

• Even though all those weird energy necklaces make him look kinda douchey, it's hard not to admit that Josh Beckett was kinda great today. Line: 8.0 IP, 29 TBF, 8 K, 1 BB, 8 GB on 19 BIP. The last bit isn't EXCELLENT, but if you strike dudes out, it ain't no thang.

Luis Valbuena's line this year in 185 MLB PAs: .164/.262/.239. In 119 Triple-A PAs: .313/.420/.604.

Brian Duensing is an interesting SP option, I declare. Tonight wasn't exactly sharp (6.0 IP, 24 TBF, 3 K, 4 BB), but he gets ALOT of ground balls (10 on 17 BIPs today).

• Five pitchers took the mound for the Cardinals today, each of whom threw at least one inning. Only infielder Aaron Miles allowed no runs.

Buster Posey = not so bad. Line: 3-for-5 with a BB and K. Now batting .356. "Lefty Joe Mauer" seems pretty fair.

Ted Lilly allowed fewer runs than Mat Latos, but he didn't really pitch any better than him. I'd much rather have the latter on my fantasy team.

Miguel Tejada's four-bagger off Lilly was of the majestic variety, I declare.

Caution, Warning

Rick Porcello struck out only 1 of the 22 batters he faced. Not only that, but he induced ground balls on only 9 of 19 BIPs -- usually a strength for him. In other words, that he allowed 7 ER in 4.1 IP isn't shocking.

Thomas Diamond had 10 K in only 6.0 IP today -- his major league debut. Why caution, then? Because his minor league numbers suggest he'll generally strike out fewer than that while walking a whole bunch (say, like, 5.00 BB/9). Also, his groundball rate has routinely been in the low 30|PERCENT| range in the minors. That's bad on a windy day in Wrigley.

Angel Sanchez was a homer shy of the cycle and had 6 RBIs. Unfortunately, he's still Angel Sanchez.

• Don't freak out about either Jaime Garcia or Bud Norris. The former gave up 10 H on 23 BIP; the latter, 7 H on 18 BIP. Bad luck in both cases.

Joe Saunders only allowed 1 ER in 9 IP. That HAPPENED, yes. But it's UNLIKELY to happen again.

Stolen Bases

Juan Pierre (40), Alexis Rios (24), Shin-Soo Choo (14), Sean Rodriguez (8), Michael Cuddyer (3), Gregor Blanco (1), Felix Pie (1), Josh Thole (1).

Caught Stealing

Andres Torres (7), Kelly Johnson (5), Ryan Braun (3), A.J. Pierzynski (3), Ronny Cedeno (2), Chris Carter (1), Alex Gonzalez (1).

Save Chances

Joel Hanrahan, converted (1). Line: 1 IP, 1 H, 2 K. With Octavio Dotel gone, Hanrahan might be the best bet for saves in Pittsburgh.

Jonathan Papelbon, converted (25). Line: 1 K. Little else.

Francisco Rodriguez, converted (23). No walks, no hits, no nothing.

Rafael Soriano, converted (31). One of everything: H, R, BB, K. Actually, the run wasn't earned.

John Axford, converted (16). He gave up a run. Otherwise, fine.

Joakim Soria, converted (31). Blam!

David Aardsma, converted (19).

Jonathan Broxton, converted (21).

Closer, Non-Save

Mike Gonzalez pitched 1.2 high-ish leverage innings, but Aldredo Simon finished off the game, a 6-3 win for the O's.

Billy Wagner was unable to hold a tie game versus the Mets. Jeff Francoeur hit a homepiece off him.

Other Relievers

Kyle Farnsworth gave up a lead in the 7th inning. That's not news. The news is that he did it for the Braves.

Lineup-ology

• In just his fourth MLB game, Jeff Frazier has apparently hit his way to the three spot in the Detroit lineup. Either that, or Jim Leyland is the craziest of the old coots.

• Pop quiz: Will Rhymes (a) batted SECOND for Tigers today or (b) is so-called because he's a pop music sensation?

Howie Kendrick started at first base for the fourth time this season. So, now you know that, I guess.

• Migue Cairo batted third, played first base, and then moved over to shortstop.

• I keep ignoring Hector Luna's name in the Florida lineup because I HAVE NO IDEA WHO HE IS.

Rick Ankiel played CF and batted 7th for Atlanta.

Chris Getz batted leadoff for Kansas City -- just so you know that I know that you know that I know.

Matt Tuiasosopo started at third base in place of Jose Lopez, who's dealing with a hammy situation.

The Young and Potentially Restless

Dayan Viciedo hit his third homer 67 AB.

Carlos Torres started the second game of the White Sox' doubleheader at Detroit. He's recorded 122 K in 129.1 Triple-A innings. Today, though, not so much: 5 BB, 4 K, and exactly 100 line drives conceded.

• His superficial numbers (6.46 ERA entering play) don't look like much, but Trevor Bell's component stats are strong. He had a 4.04 xFIP before a strong start (5.1 IP, 5 K, 1 BB) tonight.

Peter Bourjos! Peter Bourjos! Peter Bourjos!

Chris Heisey entered today with a line of .292/.373/.584. He went 2-for-4 with a BB. Hey, and he played CF. 

Ryan Kalish started in RF and batted ninth for the Red Sox and went 2-for-3.

• Gadzooks: Josh Thole is only 23 and entered play with a line of .292/.404/.375. The inflated OBP might actually be due to batting 8th a bunch, I don't know. Also, I'm not looking that crap up.

Allen Craig started in RF for the Cards today and went 2-for-3 with a BB. He and Jon Jay will be holding down that corner of the outfield with Ryan Ludwick gone.